On the Upbeat, Positively Carolan

Becoming Me

I’m now a retired female, white — at least on the outside – and I married young, too young. He was white as I didn’t know anything else, and for a while our life was exciting, including 14 months in Orleans, France and some European travel courtesy of the US Army.

Once back home in the US, I got a job to supplement his salary as a teacher/coach and, by the time I turned 25, we had 5 darling kids. But on my 30th birthday I came to the realization that this was just not my life.

Divorce ensued and ever after I filled the comfortable role of non-custodial parent. Of course reasons for all of this are complex, but what I knew then was that I needed to become ME! But the catch had been that doing so hinged on getting permission from my husband to strive, accomplish, grow — even have fun.

Over the years he was not the only white man who implicitly said, “Who the hell do you think you are to think you can do THAT? — no matter what it was I dreamt of achieving. (As a result I later found my way into the world of color, where I discovered men infinitely more appreciative of female drive, smarts, ambition.)

Anyway, on the final night of the historic presidential election of 2012, I felt Obama rip asunder the historic “white male supremacy” concept!

Never again shall bigoted rich white men be allowed to dismiss the rest of us as invisible pests. We – minorities of every stripe (African-American, Latino-America, American Indian, Asian-American) together with my fellow progressive Caucasian women — have proven we ARE the new multicultural United States of America.




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