The night before my husband and I were splitting, once and for all, I decided I must write him a final note. A personal goodbye after 13 years of marriage. But also some serious words about our 5 children (6 to 13 in age), who would be staying with him, while I assumed the role of non-custodial parent.
I have to be honest and admit that in one way I look toward the future as a challenge. But I certainly have second thoughts about the kids.
You have the opportunity to be a better parent than they have ever had. I hope you will try. Remember patience — and interest in them. Listen with both ears when they talk. Try to say “yes” as often as “no”. Participate. Answer questions. Look up interesting things in books. If you let them, I think they can teach you a zest for life!
I have many regrets, of course. I wish it could be different. I hope it all turns out for the best.
Maybe, as my mother is wont to say, I do live in a cheap novel type of world. Still, I hope “the public” doesn’t convince you that you wasted a lot of years on a complete no-good-nik. I will never believe that it was wrong in the beginning. You were what I needed them. I hope you feel I was right for you at least for a few years — although I do feel rather a failure at this point …
I can only end by saying I’m sorry I caused you so much trauma and please let my children believe in me. I will always love them.